Let your body be postpartum.

"You hardly look like you've had a baby!"

"Damn, girl, you look amazing. How did you lose the baby weight?"

It's like we're in a race to lose the "baby weight" after the baby is born. .
Why is that we aim to look like we didn't have a baby, as soon as possible?

We start counting the calories. We start doing the home workouts. We join stroller bootcamps.

What if... instead... we just let our bodies be postpartum? What if we trusted that our bodies needed some time to heal? What if we waited to get back into that crazy fitness regime? What if we focused on conserving our energy to care for our new baby, and for ourselves? What if we said yes to the help, and rested?

Creating a baby changes your body forever. You don't need to "get your body back", cause your body never left. 😉

Let's start changing the conversation around women's bodies, during pregnancy and afterwards.

Two kids under two.

I was tired. The toddler didn’t sleep well. My husband travelled a lot with work. No family in town. Potty training.

Trying to navigate life as a family of four was hard.

But yet I started exercising as soon as I could. I went to a bootcamp when Madelyn was 6 weeks old. We ran. We did burpees. We did crunches.

I was praised for getting out when she was so little. It was like a badge of honour.

I get it. I was there. I wanted that sweat. I wanted to lose the “baby weight”. So I exercised. A lot. And I paid for it for the next 7 years.

I wish someone told me to wait. I wish someone told me that the fitness classes will be there...later. I wish someone would have told me that I would have the rest of my life to get that sweat on.

I wish someone would have told me to Rest. Recover Rehab. Retrain.

Our bodies can take a beating as we create a baby. And our bodies need to heal.

There are some things that moms can do to help that process. To help heal the postpartum body.
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Ive created a guide on the top four things every mom needs to do to help heal their postpartum body. Click on my link to get your free copy.
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I ish someone would have told me what to do.

There are things you can do to help heal your body BEFORE you start back into your regular exercise. Grab my free guide here.

Postpartum Depression and Anxiety. You are not alone.

This is a guest post from my friend and colleague Sam Kimura. Sam is a mom of two, a registered nurse and a Mama Coach.

Sam tells her story about her journey through pregnancy and postpartum and how she bravely dealt with her postpartum depression and anxiety.

 

The Journey I Never Expected

Becoming a mom was never an option for me. You know when you just know that you have a purpose in life? Mine was to become a mom. Or so I thought until I experienced postpartum depression and anxiety.

My journey starts with the birth of my daughter, 5 years ago. My husband and I had been married for four years and are high school sweethearts. I was the girl who did things by the book. I went to nursing school. I married the love of my life. We both shared in the triumphs of our “big people” jobs and bought a house. I am a rule follower. So, when we decided to have a baby it was a very simple and logical decision. A baby makes three!

During my labour with my daughter, things didn’t go as planned. I was in active labour for over 24 hours before I asked for an epidural and could relax. I had some sleep and woke up to everything going wrong. I was bleeding significantly and there were a lot of alarm bells. I looked at the floor and it was covered in blood. I looked at my husband and he was the color of the wall. We were quickly in a c-section to save our lives and that was the end of any kind of control that I had during my first and very impressionable labour.

After a scary delivery, we were both “healthy” so we went home and I tried not to talk about my experience because I was so grateful that we were okay.

After all, what did I have to feel sad over? I had my baby girl. I didn’t remember my first day with her, but none of that mattered because we didn’t die.

Sounds ridiculous, doesn’t it?

My feelings about her labour and delivery were silent until I was pregnant with my second baby, 2 years later. The day I found out I was pregnant I had an instant dread of delivery and I declared that having another c-section was not an option. I was not going to feel a loss of control this time.

Things got worse in pregnancy and I was experiencing prenatal anxiety. I wasn’t aware of what this was, even as an RN, and I simply believed that my anxiety was based on the threat of preterm labour. I was never screened for PPD or anxiety during pregnancy and no one ever told me that things were about to get so much worse after he was born.

My delivery with my son was perfect. If I could write a textbook for how a labour and delivery should go, this was it. He came out all cute and squishy, fed immediately and was the most content and happy baby you would ever meet. He was perfect. But the anxiety didn’t go away, it actually became worse.

I describe postpartum anxiety and depression as losing your best friend.

You knew her so well. But someone took her away and no matter how much you want her to come back, she won’t--- at least not without support. I frequently would glare in to the mirror in the morning and wonder where the confident, happy, healthy looking person was--- all I saw was a stranger.

I suffered for months before I asked for help.

My husband didn’t even know how much I struggled. He would leave in the morning and I would pretend we were going to have a great day and then I would cry for an hour after he left. How was I supposed to look after my two gorgeous children when I was silently panicking and doubting my ability to be a mom.

This was everything I ever wanted, but it didn’t feel like I was meant to be a mom.

I fell in to a deep depression after almost a year of constant panic attacks. I would wake up multiple times a night feeling like the room was closing in on me and I would be drenched in a cold sweat. I couldn’t get a break from anxiety, even in my sleep. The depression became worse when I was so tired that I lost touch with reality. I believed this would never end. I believed it was going to be a lifelong illness and my kids didn’t deserve me.

Things turned around on the day that I decided to accept help from my family doctor.

She had been asking me for months if I was willing to accept more help for anxiety, which I declined for every reason I could think of. As soon as I asked for help it was like one thousand pounds of weight was lifted off my shoulders. My doctor gave me enough hope to take the first steps in getting connected with a great team in a mental health program. I spent months talking to them. The hospital had an entire team of professionals who knew exactly what I was going through--- I wasn’t alone and the discomfort and agony of mental illness does not have to be a life sentence. They treated me with respect and understanding, like I had a broken leg and needed specialized care to heal my bones. I hadn’t slept longer than an hour at a time in over a year, my body and my mind was in crisis and they allowed me to respect my body in my healing process.

There is a good part to this story, I promise!

Once I recovered I started looking for ways that I could help my community. Helping others after you experience a traumatic life event is a known therapeutic strategy to healing. The opportunity to join The Mama Coach was presented in front of me and it was the light at the end of my tunnel. Everything that had happened was because I was meant to help moms. I decided that I never want another mother to feel as alone as I did, and this was my avenue to do this.

Becoming a Mama Coach and entrepreneur has been one of the most empowering experiences that I could ever ask for. The challenge of owning a business, while being a mom and loving myself at the same time has been a sharp learning curve but I have never been happier. Being able to help moms get rest; teach and support them about breastfeeding and prenatal care and provide evidence-based information for new moms is truly the best job I could have ever made for myself. Being a Registered Nurse, I am able to assess my clients and provide personalized care---- something I wish I had as a new mom.

I talk about my story because maternal mental health is my passion.

Asking for help does not need to be through a health care professional. It can be as simple as talking to your best friend about the scary feelings that you’re “not good enough to be a mom”. Asking for help can be going to a postpartum class and meeting other new moms, because isolation breeds doubt and insecurity. Getting out of the house is incredibly beneficial to stopping negative thoughts and feelings.

 

If I could go back and tell myself anything, it would be to allow myself to experience all of the feelings that I was afraid of.

I would have told my brand new, very young self to tell people about how scared I was when my birth became traumatizing.

I would tell my exhausted, sleep deprived self that asking for help does not make you a weak mom, it makes you an incredible mom because you want what is best for your baby.

I would tell my little 2-year-old daughter that her mom is stronger than she will ever know and that she will never have to experience this struggle because by the time she has a baby all of us will be talking about mental health like its gestational diabetes or swollen ankles.

And I will tell everyone I know that there is so much light after postpartum depression.

You just have to keep on going.

 

You got this, mama.

 

Love, Sam

You have Pelvic Organ Prolapse. Now what?

Pelvic Organ Prolapse.

What is it?

When the pelvic organs (such as bladder, uterus and rectum) drop down into the pelvis. There are 3 types of prolapse: 

Cystocele - prolapse of the bladder

Rectocele - prolapse of the rectum

Uterine - prolapse of the uterus

The grade of prolapse ranges from 0-4.  Zero is when there is no prolapse and four is when the organ is moving outside of the body.

What are the symptoms?

Feelings of a bulge, heaviness or pressure in the vaginal canal. Sometimes worse at the end of the day or after some physical activity. Sometimes it's a low back pain or pelvic pain or there is urinary, bowel or sexual dysfunction.

And sometimes, there are no symptoms.

What to do?

A pelvic floor physiotherapist can assess and determine the degree of prolapse and they can help. Some women do end up with surgery, but please don't take this as the only option available to you.

What now?

I recently had a client who didn’t exercise for years because she was afraid. Afraid it would get worse. We took it slow and found out what worked best for her. There are ways to manage and control symptoms.

Some things to consider:

First of all, how are you sleeping? What is your stress level? Often times, when these things aren't in check, symptoms can be worse.

Vary your body position when you're exercising. Lie on your back. Stand up. Kneel. Change it up. Move your body in lots of different positions.

Check your alignment. Make sure your bum is not tucked in and your ribs aren't flared up. Try to have your ribs over your hips.

Check your breathing! Exhale on exertion. Inhale and relax your pelvic floor. Once you're about to start the hardest part of the exercise, start your exhale and lift your pelvic floor.

But if that breathing strategy doesn't feel great, then try something different. It's definitely something that is not a cookie cutter for everyone and every exercise. Find out what works for YOU.
 

Change it up:

You may need to change up some of the exercises you did prior to your prolapse. You will need to tune into what each exercise does for your symptoms.

You might need to stay away from some certain exercises such as wide leg exercises, 'traditional ab' exercises such as sit-ups and leg lowers (if you do not know hot to manage the intra-abdominal pressure); weighted exercises that put pressure on the pelvic floor (overhead press, lat pulldown), and high impact exercises.

This doesn't mean you need to stay away from them FOREVER!  You need to change the strategy with that movement. You need to make sure you can effectively manage your breathing and your alignment during your daily activities and your workouts, and then you may be able to incorporate some of your former favourite activities.

Prolapse does not mean you have to STOP everything.

Be sure to search out some help and don't be to afraid to give some things a try.

You are not broken. There is hope in getting back to doing what you love.

Do you pee when you sneeze? Top THREE things to do if you suffer from incontinence.

Do you pee when you sneeze or cough? When you laugh too hard? How about when you run or skip? When you lift something too heavy?

Are you afraid to hit a new class at the gym because you think you'll wet your pants?  

Do you jump on a trampoline with your kids?  Or do you stay off for fear of peeing your pants?

I am constantly hearing moms joke about peeing their pants, but you know what? 

LEAKING IS NOT NORMAL!

Urinary incontinence is very common, but it is NOT NORMAL!  
 

Urinary incontinence affects over 1 in 3 women in their lifetime.
 

ONE IN THREE!

But there are ways to FIX it!  

First up, make an appointment with a Pelvic floor physiotherapist so they can assess what's going on. It may be the years of contracting your pelvic floor muscles that you can't relax them. Or it may be they are too weak. Or maybe it's something else.... Either way there are many things you can do to help the situation! 

Being pregnant ALONE puts significant pressure on your pelvic floor. No matter what your delivery looked like, your pelvic floor is now changed. Then if you add in some tearing... or forceps... or episiotomy...during labour, there is some serious damage. 

Typically your GP might send you on your way at your 6 week check up. This is NOT OK! You need to rehab and retrain those muscles. Just as you would with any other surgery of any other body part.  

Your pelvic floor is part of your core system.  And if you're leaking, that means your core system as a whole isn't working well, not just your pelvic floor. The core system includes your diaphragm, transverse abdominis and mulitifidus (back muscles) AND the pelvic floor. This whole system needs to be working together, communicating with one another to be working as an effective unit.

Even if you've had a C-section, your core system has been compromised... which means you need to work on retraining the system as well.  

Jumping on a trampoline with your kids is not something you need to avoid for the rest of your life.

One of the main things you can work on is the core - connection breath. You can read more about the Piston Breath on Julie Wiebe's website.  http://www.juliewiebept.com

Give this a try:

Take a breath, filling your whole core. Imagine the bottom part of your ribs to be an umbrella. Now as you fill with air you open that umbrella while opening up your hip bones. At the same time relax your pelvic floor.

Start your exhale, lift your pelvic floor - slightly - while bringing your hip bones back together. Exhale all the air out and imagine closing the umbrella.

Try it laying flat on the ground with your hands over your ribs, so you can feel the movement on your hands.

Mastering that breath and core connection is important. It won’t be something you have to do forever. Practice makes perfect and it will eventually become more automatic.

Check your alignment when you are wearing your baby. Bum untucked. Ribs over hips.  

Another thing to keep in check is your posture and alignment.

Think about having your ribs stacked over your hips.  

A LOT of us are either one of the following:

• Bum tuckers. Ribs are leaning backwards and bum is tucked under.

...or...

• Rib thrusters.  Ribs are thrust up and out and the back is over-arched.

When you have your ribs stacked over your hips, you are in a better position for proper breathing and movement.  And it helps create the optimal intra-abdominal pressure in your core.  

But you don't have to be perfect ALL the time.  Life happens.  We have to pickup our toddler while simultaneously feeding our baby. Or we have to pickup the baby with groceries hung over one arm. It's important to think about it, recheck and re-align. But don't beat yourself up if you find yourself in alignment that's not neutral all the time.

“If you leak while you run, you are leaking more than just urine. You are leaking energy, strength and athletic performance.”

— Julie Wiebe

You don't need to live with incontinence.  Whether it be when you're laughing, coughing, jumping rope, or running, it doesn't need to be your new normal. Here's what you should do. 

1. Book your appointment with a Pelvic floor physio therapist.
2. Master your core-connection breath.
3. Check your alignment.

And fire me a message if you have any questions or need a recommendation for a PT in your area.  The fact is, it's not going to get better as you age.  You need to do something about it now.

You can get back to life without leaks.  It will require a little bit of effort.  But aren't you worth it?